no cats were harmed in the making of CAT VR, but some did experience catnip-level nirvana

brain-monitoring, emotion-measuring, digital marketing agency ‘isobar’ was labeled one of the world’s most innovative agencies in 2018, by fast company. they’re one of the first companies to measure users’ emotional responses to virtual reality content via the use of neuroscience research. recently, they partnered with zoos victoria — slightly altered their research process — in order to bring quality virtual reality experiences to an overlooked target audience (cats).

all images courtesy of isobar

according to PVRR pet virtual reality research technical brief & synopsis, there are 600 million small cats in the world. not all, but hundreds of millions of these felines are assured to be content consumers. and we’re off — isobar’s PVRR research paper brilliantly parodies their own design process. stakeholders — read on for a brief synopsis of the synospsis; find the full PVRR website, here.

PVRR utilizes EEG and EKG technology to monitor cats’ emotions to certain stimuli. the methodology accounts for the fact that cats see less color, but see better in the dark than humans. isobar’s tests are conducted with only the most authentic cat content (swimming koi fish, low-flying birds, etc.). they then measure and convert their findings into TD/m’s (totally disinterested expressions per minute). the excerpt below provides fuller explanation.

‘we pioneered a patent-pending process that is referred to as ‘W.A.H.T’- whisker attenuation and haptic telemetry. this groundbreaking addition to the computer vision and sensor platform has allowed us to leverage software algorithms to understand the ‘tells’ each feline has related to their whiskers and be able to accurately understand when a cat experiences one of the following states:

• totally disinterested (TD)

• disinterested (D)

• mildly disinterested (MD)

• cat-nipped (CNP) – a term we’ve been using to express the same brain activity seen in highly stimulated cats when under the effects of catnip’

an authentic business-data-analysis voice is maintained throughout the paper. of course, any such essay audaciously posted on april 2, 2018, a day after april fools day, must retain as much authenticity as possible if it’s going to fool anyone. the full 10 page write up takes investors and stakeholders through and extremely thorough story — hopefully similar to isobar’s actual process. I mean, if I were going to invest in cat VR, I would want it to be backed by hard data and neuroscience. isobar and zoos victoria do not disappoint. I suggest giving it a full read; there are a lot of hidden gems buried in this satire. would you invest?